Well well well, look who it is...... me. It's me, writing on my own blog. What the hell am I doing back here? Seeing as it's been over a year since my last post, I thought it might be time for a little visit.

Not sure if I can really summarize the past year in a nutshell, but - tour ended and was INCREDIBLE every step of the way, came back to LA to my boyfriend and my cat and dog and my friends, booked a few lines on a couple TV shows, auditioned a lot, booked some shows, and decided to write a blog post. Yep, that's what's up.

It was so bittersweet to close American Idiot. As I said the other day on my facebook page, each and every Idiot changed my life. The cast and crew became another new family, people I know I can feel at home with any time I see them. Every single person that come to the show and enjoyed it or didn't enjoy it or came to the stage door to say hey or get photos or just be weird with us were so so cool. My family, sorry guys but you became Idiots too and I love you for it. There was one show in San Francisco that my dad brought I think 16 people to come see it and I gave them all a backstage tour afterword. I'm not even sure I was allowed to do it but who cares, it was awesome. I really hope it doesn't bother people around me too much when I reminisce about the show because it's probably never going to leave my bloodstream.

And what else? Well I was someones #WomanCrushWednesday on twitter a while ago so that was new and fun. The play I'm understudying in - The Boomerang Effect - closes next weekend and if all goes according to plan I should have one more performance. It's been great working on a straight play for the first time since probably when I did A Midsummer Night's Dream, I must have been about 15 or 16. Summer has been slow and relaxing but it seems as if the auditions are starting to pick up again for episodic season as well as a bunch of musical projects I'm excited about. As a matter of fact I have a callback for one this Monday! When I went in for the audition a few days ago I chatted with the casting director about American Idiot a little first, then sang for about 10 seconds before he stopped me and said that he was going to call me back. It's not often that that happens, I've only had that happen to me a couple times before, but when it does it's a huge boost of confidence! I'm so thrilled to go in for the creative team on Monday.

I think that was a pretty good recap, yeah? In closing I'll leave you with this video of me and my best friend Katherine. It's called Song Time, but it's less about the songs and more about how weird we are together, about an hour of us condensed into 7 minutes of the good stuff. You'll find a little bit of singing in there, and even some sound relationship advice. Enjoy. I love you.

Song Time with Katherine And Nicci

Your Questions Answered...

Ladies at our opening night in Minneapolis

Has it truly been nearly two months since I last blogged? I felt like I had made a promise to myself  - maybe even to my readers - that I'd blog more, and now I've gone and done the opposite. Or maybe I didn't make that promise. It's been so long, I can't even remember.


We've made it all the way to State College, Pennsylvania by way of Toronto, Detroit, Boston, Raleigh, Chicago, and Minneapolis. To sum it up briefly: Toronto was cooooold but we had a lot of fun; Detroit was much more friendly than we had expected; Boston was so cool to explore and had great food; Raleigh was nice and relaxing; Chicago was wonderful and I had my first real deep dish pizza there; and Minneapolis was confusing with it's skyway but gave us some of the best audiences yet! Now we're in the  home of Dan Gleason's alma mater. We opened to a pretty big but polite crowd on Tuesday, and last night we had a great, loud audience for closing. That's right, only two shows and now we're off to St. Louis!


To help me get the ball rolling, I asked people on twitter if there was anything they wanted to know, so here we go...


@cgtheatregeek - "What are your fav and least fav parts about being on the road all the time?"
   + I love being able to travel to so many places I've never been before, and I'm a big foodie so I love to see what the local favorites are! Least favorite part would maybe be living out of a suitcase and trying to keep it under 50 lbs. It's also tricky to eat well sometimes, depending on the area we're staying.


@whatsername43 - "favorite things about the tour and playing extraordinary girl :D"
   + The company I keep is one of my favorite things about tour. Cast, crew, everyone... all so cool. My favorite thing about playing Ex Girl is probably that once I "become" her, I get to take a little break backstage! The first half of my show is dance/sweat/sing/sweat more. It's nice to finally take a breather after I fly.


@alyson_leonard - "Have there been any big stand-out moments for you that have happened while on tour? What has been your favorite stop so far?"
   + There have been a couple not so great stand-out moments involving flying... I guess it can get weird  going from city to city, dealing with different power sources and new dressers. There was one time in maybe Boston (?) when Scott's mic fell off his head and I somehow got it back on to a degree, I felt like a hero :) And last week we had a huge fiasco... for anyone who saw the Sunday matinee on the 26th, just know that you didn't see, or hear for that matter, what the flight was intended to be.
   On that note, there have been lots of great stand-out moments as well! On our travel day out of Raleigh, all the girls decided to dress like "elegant ladies". We got some interesting looks at the airport. Being on TV for the new year's eve celebration in Canada as soooo much fun! Looking out over Chicago from the Willis Tower was really incredible. Lots of good moments so far.
   I've liked different thing about each city we've been to, but I'd say that so far Chicago may have been my favorite stop so far because...


@NikkiRandom1 - "how it was being in Chicago & what was your favorite thing being in Chicago for the 2 weeks?"
   + ...One, we were there for more than a week! I actually got to unpack my suitcase and have a whole free day. Also, my boyfriend was able to be there for a few days including Valentines day <3 and we got to explore together. And also, deep dish pizza!


@armedwithlysol - "...how do you feel about fangirl stalkers at your shows?"
   + Haha, I love talking to fans after the shows! 
@armedwithlysol - "Please also finally confirm the cast vote for best deep dish Chicago pizza. What's the best thing you ate on tour?"
   + I don't know about the whole cast, but I dined at Lou Malnati's and Pizzeria Due (because Pizzeria Uno was too packed) and I'd have to say that while Due was nice, The "Lou" at Lou Malnati's has my vote. Wow. Wow. Like, really.
@armedwithlysol - "Legit: How'd your pilot audition go? How do you find time to audition on the road? Also, how do you guys choose roomies?"
   + The audition went great! My manager in Los Angeles got me the audition, it was just lucky that they happened to have a big casting office in Chicago. Several other people from the cast auditioned for the project as well! 
   As for roommates, most of the cast opts to have their own room, but once in a while Krystina, Jillian and I will choose to room together for a little extra per diem. Sometimes it's every other city, it just kind of happens. 


@IdiotOnTourFan - "So much has happened since your last post, would love to hear some highlights! What's a typical day like?"
   + A typical day... generally most of us sleep in, then get some food. Maybe a trip to the gym for the muscle twins (Vince and Dan), and maybe a little exploring, more eating, often a lot of relaxing. We get to the theatre an hour before showtime (plus 15 mins for whoever is doing flight call) to warm up and get ready, do the show, then have dinner and sometimes go out for drinks.


@evan71788 - "can we get a video please?"
   + As a matter of fact, I'm working on one now, I'll put it up as soon as it's done :)


Well that was fun! I love answering questions you guys have so keep 'em coming. And I mean it this time, I will try to blog more often!!

A Look Into The Mind Of Nicci Claspell...

As I'm sure you can guess, much has happened in the past few months. Chicago has been over for some time now, and was a really fantastic production. I can't say it went off without a hitch, but I'm confident in saying that everyone is really proud of what we put up. And it was filmed!! That is rarely allowed out here, so it's exciting that we'll be able to order dvds and see how good we actually were :)

In other un-career-related news, I've been single for a few months. It's a strange thing after being in a serious relationship for over 3 years, but I knew it was what had to happen. Very hard to do, but the right decision. In the time since, I've been focusing a lot on rebuilding relationships with friends and dedicating myself to my career. Which brings us back to the point of this blog...

I've been on several auditions, a few film/tv/commercial but mainly plays and musicals. I've actually been cast in and had to turn down/drop out of a few projects for various reasons. It's something I hate doing, but have found it necessary due to other developments! Which I'll get to right now.

The main reason I'm back here today is to talk about my most recent trip to New York. As you may have noticed in past blog entries, I try not to divulge too much information about projects I get excited about. Maybe it's superstition... considering the fact that I wear the exact same thing to a callback as I did to the initial audition, right down to socks and undies (yes they get washed first), I'd say it's probably superstition. Well, I've been doing the opposite lately and it seems to be working wonders. So get ready for the longest post ever, because I plan on giving more details than ever before!

I'll start by saying the main event here is the American Idiot first national tour. I attended an open call at the beginning of March, three months ago. I woke up later than I intended, and expected there to be a huge turnout for the call. Here's what I wrote in my planner while I was waiting for my turn to sing:

"This could have been the one, but this is not the one. Just because I couldn't get ready fast enough. I'm number 46 or 48, somewhere around there. I believe they've got Equity & EMC scheduled till at least 11:40, and the audition is supposed to go until 4:45, so hopefully it will go smoothly so I can sing. I like open calls. I like when they hold us in a big dance studio, it's great for observing people. They asked for the guys to bring a guitar to accompany themselves, so I'd say there's at least 3 guitars being played simultaneously at any given time. I like that this all doesn't make me nervous. It may have a few years ago, but I feel relaxed now. The only thing is, I wonder if it looks like I'm trying too hard, with my hair and my clothes. I brought a few different tops & shoes just in case, and I'm pretty sure I'll be changing. It's not like I don't have the time!"

And a little while later:

"This might be the one. They're actually ahead of schedule, by about 20 minutes. My appointment time is 3:20, so I may go shopping & be back by 2:30. Though I may not - knowing me, if I leave, I may not come back.

Even just a callback. For ensemble. Please! A shot is all I need."

So now you all see the flashes of desperation I get while auditioning. At least I can still be relaxed during it all.

Here's what happened... I had planned on singing a Paramore song that I didn't really know, and wasn't even sure I liked. I have Pat Benatar's "Heartbreaker" in my book as a backup, but I figured half of the girls there would be singing that. I did decide to leave and come back, and while I was in my car I was thinking of other songs I could possibly sing instead. When I got home I began searching for Melissa Etheridge sheet music, when it hit me. "Whats Up" by 4 Non Blondes. I'd never heard it on piano, and have only sung in a handful of times when it came on the radio or someone else sang it at karaoke, but I knew it was the song I had to sing. I found the sheet music online, printed it, and headed back over to the studio.

There was only a little bit of waiting until it was my time to sing, and the dance studio had cleared out considerably. I got into the room, went over the song with the pianist, and began to sing. I did have to start over once because I underestimated how much breath I would need to singe the first line, but once I got going again I don't think it could have gone much better. In fact, in the middle of the song where it starts to get loud and powerful, I'm pretty sure a silly grin crept up on my face because I realized it sounded even better than I thought it would! It sat perfectly in my voice and I belted the top notes with ease.

It takes me about 20 minutes to get home from this particular studio. I looked at my phone when I got home and saw that there was a voicemail - it was from the American Idiot people, requesting I come back the next day for a callback. I hustled to switch my shift at work and confirmed that I would be there. The following day, the main casting director was also in the room. I sang the same song, and was asked on the spot to come back in a few days to sing once again, and to dance. I was given music for the character Whatsername, one of the leads.

The day of that third callback was an exciting one! I sang in the morning - my audition song, plus one of the two songs from the show they had given me, it was put on tape this time - then I had an audition for a film, then went back for a dance call for American Idiot. It's days like those they make you feel like a real like actor, pounding the pavement. Dance calls usually make me just a little nervous because although I can dance, I wouldn't consider myself a "dancer". Luckily, this dance call mainly involved running back and forth and throwing ourselves around. Though a little painful, it was easy as pie. I was among the 6 or so girls that were asked to stay and learn a second, shorter combination. That, too, was pretty easy to pick up.

About a week later I received an email from casting, saying they thought I did really well at the callback. They wouldn't know what the "next steps" would be until May, but to let them know if there was anything that would make me unavailable to them.

Fast forward to 4 weeks ago (wow, was it a month ago already??), I got an email saying that more callbacks would be held in New York and they would like me to attend if I was able. Well, there is NO way that I was not going to be available!! Luckily, I had already requested the weekend in question off because of a friend's potential birthday weekend in Vegas. As fate would have it, that excursion was cancelled so I didn't have to miss out on any big celebration, and I didn't have to get any shifts covered at work because that was the week that one of our new girls was supposed to start, so she just got those shifts. Everything fit right into place.

I want to take a moment to thank my wonderful parents for providing funds for me to fly to New York and comfortably spend what turned into a week there. A big thanks to my sister as well for hanging out with me and letting me stay with her. Cecil, Anne, and Sarah Claspell, you are the best people in the world :)

I took a redeye on friday night and arrived around 11:00 on Saturday morning. Sarah met me at the subway station and we headed to her beautiful place in West Harlem to drop off my stuff. That night we attended the third annual Improm, which is an improv prom. People involved in comedy all throughout NY dress up to the nines, and couples get to do a 5-10 minute improv set together. Which meant that, as each others dates, Sarah and I got to perform together for pretty much the first time ever. I was nervous about it, having only completed the first level of UCB's improv classes (ooh! I'll have to talk about that later!) but it was fun and we got some laughs. After that, she and I went on to kill it at karaoke downstairs, and impress people with how much we are alike.

The only important thing that happened on Sunday is that Sarah and I got lobster rolls from Luke's Lobster. It was honestly one of the most amazing foods I've ever had. We also went to Williamsburg and saw the most hipster flea market I've ever seen. As I said, Sunday was all about the lobster rolls.

Monday was Memorial Day and we attended "The Company Picnic", another event involving many people in the comedy community. There was also a guac-off which we participated in, and our blue cheese guacamole was a hit. I don't think anyone officially voted, but if they had I'd like to believe we would have won.

And now for the main events, what you've all been waiting for, the callbacks! Tuesday morning at 10:30 was my appointment time. I got up early to do my hair exactly as I had for the initial audition and dress in the exact same clothes. As luck would have it, Sarah works directly across the street from the studios where the callbacks were being held, so she escorted me all the way there! I had some extra time so I decided to find out why everyone from the East coast loves Dunkin Donuts so much. Yeah, they know how to make a donut.

Once inside the studio, I had a little time to wait around and talk to the other people there. I saw a few familiar faces from the Los Angeles auditions. Once again, not nervous. Pretty relaxed. I got into the room not too long after my appointment time and sang the same two songs I had been given three months prior. We were asked to prepare one of five poems, but to my knowledge they didn't actually have anyone do them. When I was done singing, the casting director walked with me out of the room, and asked me to come back later to audition for another project they're doing. When I went to his office to pick up the sides, an associate/assistant told me that they're reviving On A Clear Day You Can See Forever on Broadway, and it's going to be starring Harry Connick Jr. I had a few hours to kill so I bought a new dress that would be more appropriate for this particular role - a 1940's Jazz singer. I'm positive it would have taken away a little if I had shown up in the American Idiot attire. I ended up reading/singing for the casting associate/assistant that I had gotten the sides from, and it felt very good. He actually looked through my book after I sang and asked me to do another song, one of my favorites to sing - "Life of the Party" from The Wild Party. I love singing that song because I feel I can really let go and just have fun. He said considering the amount of time I had to work with the material from the script, I did a great job.

I was called to come the next day to sing and dance for American Idiot again. This time the director, Michael Mayer, was in the room. This was very exciting because he was the original director for Spring awakening, and he's also directing On A Clear Day. That seemed to go well, and once I was done singing, I was given music to look over for a different character. The casting director talked with me again and asked how long I would be in town, and I told him I had a flight early the next morning. He told me to look into how much it would be to change my flight to a later time/date so I could be seen once more for AmId in the morning, and On A Clear Day in the afternoon. If need be, they could help out with the cost. I immediately got on the phone with the airline and got a quote. I also called my manager to tell her the good news.

This particular day got up to about 90 degrees, and had about 64% humidity. It also happened to be the day of the dance call. I changed into my dance attire, complete with leg warmers and a fishnet shrug thing, but once we started dancing these things were quickly removed. Though there was air conditioning in the room, there was only so much it could do with probably 30-something people running around and slamming ourselves into the ground. We also learned another combination that involved capoera and other defensive moves. There was not a single dry body to be seen. Once again, I was asked along with a few other girls to stay and do the same girly combination we were taught in Los Angeles.

As I was leaving the room, I spoke with the casting director and told him the price of the cheapest ticket we found. He said it wasn't a problem, they would reimburse me for it. The whole thing. What? These things happen?? It's a strange and wonderful feeling when you're liked and wanted to the point that a casting company will shell out hundreds of dollars just to keep you in town for one more day. Even now, I'm still trying to wrap my head around it.

A few hours later I sang once again, this time with just the pianist and musical director, the music for the other character I was given earlier. I was told to forget about the other music and come back the following morning at 11 to sing this new stuff, for the character Extraordinary Girl.

And I did. The toughest part about this whole experience was not being warmed up enough. Unfortunately I couldn't belt some of the notes I normally would have been able to, but luckily I think I was still able to mix them very well. I get the impression that the creative team liked me a lot, and there's nothing more you can really ask for than that.

I had a couple hours to kill before my On A Clear Day audition, so I tracked down the Luke's Lobster truck and got another lobster roll. It was absolute heaven.

I returned to the studios, changed into my more appropriate dress, and sang/read for the Clear Day creative team. Michael Mayor seemed to be impressed that I could transition from punk rock AmId to smooth jazzy Clear Day, and said it's been a good day. It certainly was. A good week, actually.

I slept on and off from around 8pm until 3am, packing and facebooking intermittently. I caught a cab at 4am for a 6:55 flight from LaGuardia. Arrived in LA around noon, went home to drop off my stuff, and went straight to work.

There are several things I glossed over, this entry being long enough already. I got to meet up with some of my friends from my Alabama RENT cast, the lovely Meagan Elizabeth Lewis, Stephanie Mosley, and Lauren Bowling. Tuesday after the first auditions I got to see Sarah perform in 2 improv shows at UCB which were absolutely incredible. I also finally treated myself to 4 meatball sliders from The Meatball Shop, one of my very favorite places to eat in the world, as a celebratory last meal in NY.

I heard from my manager this morning that I seemed too young for On A Clear Day You Can See Forever, which I was half expecting but I'm so happy just that I was brought in for it in the first place. She also said we should hear about American Idiot by the end of the week, which is exciting and nerve wracking. I'd rather it just be a surprise, but now you know exactly how long you have to send good vibes my way. I really do feel great about the whole experience and have a good feeling about it. I'll be sure to update here when I get word!

(to view pictures to go along with all of these words, check out my album on facebook!)

Ok Fine, Here I Am

(Yeah, that's me there in the middle)

I really have no idea how Evan has blogged every.single.day. for the past I don't know how many years. Like they say... it's not hard to remember, it's just so easy to forget.

I can assure you that there are many valid reasons for my absence! Valid and time consuming and exciting reasons! First of all, I got called back for Roxy and Ensemble in Chicago, and was cast as Liz! She's the one that says "Pop" in Cell Block Tango. I surprised myself in the dancing portion of the audition! Though I was sorry for about a week and a half afterword, because my muscles obviously weren't used to moving like that. We've been in rehearsal for a few weeks now, and as long as I stretch and warm up beforehand, it's really not so bad. My recovery time has been just a day or two after each dance rehearsal, and pretty soon I'm sure I'll be just fine! We open in about 3 1/2 weeks, and there are only 4 performances - March 9, 16, and 23 at 7:30, as well as a 2:00 matinee on the 23rd. These are all Wednesdays, and considering it's a 40 minute drive from LA without traffic, I understand if you can't make it. But if you can, then great! It's exciting to be working with all new people on this show, and I think we're all going to put something together that's very enjoyable.

Another thing that has been keeping my busy is getting ready for pilot season. First and foremost I finally got some new of my new headshots printed, though I think I'm going to be in the market for some more soon. 'Tis the nature of the biz. I also had an audition a few couple weeks ago for an exciting new pilot, produced by Brian Grazer. My manager referred me to an acting coach another client of hers goes to, Stan Kirsch, so I had a session with him a few days before the audition. It was really great - I may try out a few other coaches, but I really liked him. I liked that I walked out of there so much more confident about my performance. I also just put another audition on tape to send to Telsey & Co. They cast all the big Broadway musicals, and they're also casting a new pilot about Broadway musicals! This one is being produced by Spielberg. Huge. My manager and I agree they're probably going to go the route of some big b'way star for the role, but it's fantastic to be able to put my face in front of these people.

I mentioned last time that I had a meeting with another commercial agent. This is an agency I've heard about since moving to Los Angeles, just like my theatrical agency, so I was very excited for the opportunity. The meeting went well, and a few weeks later I was asked to come in again to meet with the agent's partner. Now, in my experience thus far, meetings have been about 15-20 minutes. Somehow this one ended up being about an hour, and I left having no idea how it went. I mean, we talked about RENT. Cause eeeevveryyyyyyythiiiing iiiisssss reeeeennnnnt! Apparently in my life, it is. Anyway - I guess it worked this time because I now have a commercial agent! I am insanely excited, I've wanted this for years. Now all I have to do is get a commercial so I can pay to take improv classes and get new headshots so I can get booked for commercials.... it's an endless cycle.

On top of all this, I'm now the manager at my work. Seems we've had an almost steady flow of receptionists getting hired and then soon getting other opportunities elsewhere for at least the past 6 months, and our previous manager decided it was time to move on. So on top of my extra managerial duties, I'm training several girls and my boss is consulting me on who to hire. None of this is bad. I'm so lucky that this job is as flexible as it is, my boss is great, and my co-workers are great.

And another thing, I like to finish my taxes as soon as possible and I had a lot of info to gather this year. I've been a busy bee.

So to everyone not immediately around me (roommates, Evan, co-workers), it probably seems like I've disappeared. If I'm not at rehearsal or work or an audition, I'm researching things that have to do with rehearsal or work or auditions. I can't remember the last time I've been so involved in my own life, and I love it. The next step is to try and reincorporate other people into it, but for now I'm enthusiastic about the possibilities I'm creating.

Third Time Is Maybe Not The Charm

A dream come true twice over is plenty. I keep joking to people that I'll be doing RENT for the rest of my life, but as fun as that would be I'd miss many other opportunities. This will be my first pilot season with my manager and agent working for me, which hopefully will yield lots and lots of auditions and - with any luck - a job or two! My manager is also setting up a meeting with another commercial agent and that is going to be good, I just know it.

Wow... so in typical Nicci fashion of late, I had let myself dwell on RENT. The callback was on a Saturday, and we were told that they'd probably be finishing casting by the end of the weekend. When a few friends told me they got calls and were offered roles on Monday, I still held out hope that maybe there was more to be done. Christmas came and went and I still let myself think about it. I even sent the production office an email letting them know how much fun I had at the callback, and that I'd love to be a part of the show in any capacity.

The hardest thing was not knowing if I should be expecting something or not. Sure, no one in this industry is going to give everyone that didn't make the cut a courtesy call. But they had been posting most everything online up to that point so the fact that I never saw a final cast list made me think that maybe they were still in the process. I finally got word from two of my friends that were cast in the show that an email was sent out to the cast. My immediate reaction was to be a little sad. A) It's RENT! and B) I'd love to work with those friends again, I know they're going to be fantastic.

And then... a wave of relief came over me. I'd let a lot of anxiety build up by not letting this particular audition go, and as soon as I know I wasn't waiting for anything anymore I felt like a normal person again. Yet another example of why actors have to forget about the audition as soon as they leave the room. You can cause yourself a lot of frustration otherwise! I am very excited to see my beautiful friends in this show. Ben, my Angel from both RENTs I did, is again one of the Angels, and My darling friend Josie is a Maureen. They're going to be spectacular :)

I had an audition for a reading of a new musical today at the Pasadena Playhouse that I feel good about. Any audition where get to sing Pat Benatar and use a Russian accent is bound to be a fun one. The people behind the camera seemed to like what I did and laughed in all the right places. And now, though I feel good about it, I've let it go. If it happens it happens.

There are also a couple exciting auditions coming up, the first of which being Chicago. I submit myself for the role of Roxie (Velma has already been cast), and got a message from one of the casting people saying that we had a lot of mutual friends, and she was actually planning on finding me on facebook and asking that I come in for the audition. That could be a good sign! If my last dance audition is any indicator, I think I'll do fine tomorrow. I'm not a dancer, but I can dance. And if my body doesn't want to listen to me tomorrow, they're also casting The Last 5 Years which requires no dancing. A different song choice and I think I may have a fighting chance for that too.

Aannnnddddd lastly - I have another meeting with a commercial agent next week. I am so so thrilled. This could be the one, folks.

Too Much Talk About Music

I just got home from the Dangerous Beauty auditions and man do I feel relieved. I got all the info on this audition two weeks ago and have had that much time to think about it. On the one had, it can be nice to have that much more time to prepare, especially when they ask for 2 minutes of music, plus reading some lines. But on the other hand, that's a good amount of time to start to stress out about an audition.

Not to mention that I didn't really have any ballads or up-tempo songs that I was comfortable with or that would go over well at this audition. The one song I normally sing for auditions is kind of a power ballad, even a torch song, therefore NOT a regular ballad or up-tempo. This left me with a few choices: Take the last part of the song more briskly and pretend it's an up-tempo; sing the beginning of the song like a ballad; sing something from Chess (even though I'm not sure it's appropriate for what they're asking); or find brand new songs. So what did I choose? Well, I didn't. I prepared all of those choices.

I found one song from my AMDA days that I never sang but someone else in my class did - "Stranger To The Rain" from Children of Eden. This is a little faster than my go-to song so I took it from the bridge straight on to the end. It was more like a 1:30 but it was a good cut. Into my audition binder I also threw "Heaven Help My Heart" from Chess. That's actually not a bad ballad, I think I'll keep it in there as a just-in-case song. I put "Nobody's Side" from Chess in there too, knowing it was a definite no but at least I could sing the whole thing without forgetting anything if I ever need to. The fourth song I put in the binder was my good ole' go-to, "A New World" from Jekyll and Hyde.

Over the past week I worked on all of these things. I even dug out my keyboard and set up camp on my bed, music strewn allover my room and midi versions of each song queued up on my laptop. After reacquainting myself with all of the songs, the hardest part was to choose which songs to sing. I obviously couldn't sing "A New World" for both my ballad and up-tempo. I decided I'd definitely be doing "Stranger To The Rain", but even when I was getting ready this morning I couldn't decide on a second song.

I even decided to stray from my regular musical-theatre-audition-dress, so everything about this audition was a bit foreign to me. I did feel much better when the casting director came out to get me and told me she'd been hearing great things about me. And when I stepped into the room I got a compliment on my dress. Hooray! I went to the pianist and told him I'd start with the up-tempo, and he told me that they'd so far been doing only one song. Hooray again! I got up there and sang, and felt better than any practice run I'd done up until then. They liked the song, and then we moved onto the sides. I read through with the casting director once, was given a not by the director, and then read it again. They liked how I took the adjustment and the choices I made, and that was that!

When I left I felt confident and that's really the most important thing. I think I have a shot at it, and if not this then at least the CD has finally seen me and what I can do. Cross your fingers for me!

I Am Alive And Well

As I'm sure you've noticed, it's been about a month and a half since I last posted an entry. I haven't been trying to avoid blogging by any means - in fact there have been several times I've wanted to blog because some cool things have been happening, but I just haven't done it.

It was recently brought to my attention that some things I say here can be taken as me being narcissistic. I was worried about that when I started the blog. No one whats to toot their own horn too much for fear of others becoming annoyed with the sound. But here's what it comes down to: This is a blog about me. It's an easy way to give family and friends an update on what's happening on my professional journey, as well as some personal and social life stuff, on their own time. If anyone gets tired of reading about me, they can choose not to visit the blog.

On that note, I think it's time for an update!

So where did we leave off... Chess is long over now. We had a brilliant last weekend, and we followed our closing night 1.1 with another potluck. The cast and crew was full of so many wonderful people, there was no way we wouldn't have a good time. I don't think I wrote about this before, but a friend of one of the producers came to see the show and enjoyed it so much that he invited the whole cast to the Magic Castle! I've been wanting to go there for years and years - it's part hotel, part restaurant and venue for magicians to perform. You have to either be a member or invited and accompanied by a member to get in. Luckily, the producers friend is a member (he's a magician) and was our host for the evening. Not only did we get a private magic show from him - that I got to help out with - but there were several floors with lots of rooms and shows happening in them all night long. We were there for about 5 hours. I think that may have also had something to do with the ghost piano player that we had a sing-along with.

I also had the immense pleasure of singing a song with my chess co-star, Blake Ewing, in his one man show at Vitello's in studio city shortly after the show closed. We sang "Someday", a song what was cut from The Hunchback of Notre Dame. It's a beautiful and moving song, that as far as we know it's only carnation that can be seen is in German on youtube. So unfortunate. His show was packed and went off without a hitch.

That audition I mentioned last time went pretty well. I would have been nice to have been a little more familiar with the sides, but I did the best I could with the time I had and it was in no way a bad audition. And a good thing too because I haven't had an audition since. It's the beginning of pilot season, which means almost all efforts are going toward reviewing and choosing which pilots will go ahead, which in turn means there's not much that's casting just yet. Sure there's projects here and there, but it's not going to get back into full swing until after the new year starts.

So that means now is the time to prepare for the actors portion of pilot season! I finally had that meeting with the commercial agency on Wednesday. I feel like I'm getting better at these things, it only took me an hour to figure out what to wear! I got there with about 10 minutes to spare. The receptionist handed me a folder with four "commercials" in it, and told me to pick one to read to the agent. I spent a couple minutes with that, and then the agent come out to meet me. He was very friendly and easy to talk to, and I got a good feeling about the whole thing. It seemed like everyone there enjoys what they do and actually work for their clients. We chatted a little bit, I read the commercial a few times, and that was that. He said he's be in contact with my manager in a few days.

When I got to work I was greeted with an email from my manager. Unfortunately, it looks like there's a conflict with another client of theirs, most likely meaning they already have someone that's my type. So that's a no-go. Of course my initial reaction was that I was bummed, I've really been looking forward to this. But then I though you know, I guess I can't get them all on the first try. I've been very lucky and signed with the first manager and theatrical agency that I've met with. That really doesn't happen all the time, so I'm excited to take more meetings when we get them. Plus, I'm now 25 and that means I'm legally allowed to do beer and alcohol commercials. I don't know how much that will work to my advantage, but I'd like to imagine that it will very much :)

I'm also lucky that I do, in fact, have an audition next week. It's for a new musical, Dangerous Beauty, based on a 1998 film that was based on a non-fictional book. The casting director for Reprise is bringing me in. That's pretty exciting, because she hasn't even met me yet so either her relationship with my manager is very strong, or Jason Alexander's recommendation weighs pretty heavily. Or Both! The show is going to be in Pasadena which I love because it's so close, and the pay would be pretty darn good too. I'm in the process of choosing some songs. I need two, one uptempo and one ballad, that are 32 bars each. That's a bit of a challenge because nearly every musical theater audition I go to requests 16 bars or less of one song, so I'll be singing 4x as much as I'm used to! It will be good though. I just know it.

The Interim

Over the past two weeks I've been having dreams about Chess. In the first one, we couldn't get the full orchestra back and we just had a synthesizer which we couldn't hear over our own voices. In the second one I think I was sick and had to send someone (from a show I did over a year ago) to go on and sing my first song. Finally last night, I was about to go on stage when I realized I forgot to bring my costume back to the theater, so we had to find something that would work instead. Funny thing is, I wasn't nervous in any of these dreams. I was just happy to be back on the stage doing the show again!

Jeff hosted a lovely party for Michael on Wednesday. Most of the people involved with the show came by for food and good company, and it was really good to see everyone again. Michael is going to try to get his school to bring the show out to Ohio for a performance or two, perhaps in the spring. I think that's a fantastic idea and I'm all for it. I think he thinks we're joking when we say we're into it, but i don't think any of us are. The chance to see Michael again and take this show literally on the road, if even only for one performance, would be really really fun!

Sooo... I had an audition on Friday. My manager emailed me the day before wondering if I'd be interested in auditioning for the game show "Don't Forget The Lyrics". I said why not. For an opportunity to win a couple thousand dollars? Sure. Plus, you never know who the casting director knows. Maybe this could put me on the illusive path to Glee (pff, right). When I got there I filled out a paper and picked three songs off a list to sing myspace karaoke style. At this point I was feeling kind of indifferent about the audition - I was comfortable there, but my career definitely wasn't riding on this show. I picked songs that I thought would show some character: Tainted Love by Soft Cell, One Week by Barenaked Ladies, and of course the old favorite, The Rose, because I wanted something that showed that I actually can sing. The weird thing was, they had different sheets hanging up for backgrounds and all kinds of props and clothes laying around so you could spice up the "music video" any way you wanted.

The weirdest part was that the office walls were all made of glass, and the room we were to sing in was right next to the elevator door, so when someone else walked in the first thing they would see is you singing your song and dancing around in a costume, or whatever you chose to do. It was a little strange. Obviously not like any other audition I've been to, because I've never auditioned for a game show before. I'm used to things I can prepare for, and feel in the moment, and this almost felt like being encouraged to put on a different personality. I can't say it was for me. If they like me and want me on the show, we'll get there when we get there. For now, I'm kinda glad to be done with it.

There was a rehearsal scheduled for tonight, but since many people were unavailable it has now become unrequired. They'll still be running though blocking with the two new people, but we're not obligated to go. Still, I think I will. I need to pick up some of the postcards with the updated show dates, and I'd like to meet these new people. Also, I want Chess back in my blood! I feel like I have to get used to some of those sky-high notes again. We will have another rehearsal on Wednesday that we'll all attend, which I'm most excited about. I can't wait to be around all those beautiful talented people again. And then Thursday is opening night number two!

Chess Success!

It was so nice to get back to the theater last night and see my lovely chessers! We had a fantastic show on Sunday, perhaps even better than what I had written about for Saturday. It may have been a personal best for everyone in the show to date!

This week in between was a busy one for me. Lots and lots of work - we're looking to fill another receptionist position, so we're rearranging to schedule for the end of the month, I've been calling applicants and setting up meetings, and doing my regular work stuff too. I also went to the Red Sox/Angels game (the Sox won! Yay!) with Evan and my roommates and neighbors and friends, went to trivia night for the first time at Q's Billiards, and had an audition. A productive and fun week.

The audition I went on was yesterday morning for Kevin Smith's new horror movie, "Red State". I was auditioning for two small rolls and I think it went fine. One of them was actually supposed to be in her 20's, which was nice. The other one (or two actually, it was for Girl 1 AND Girl 2) is a 17 year old high school kid. Not that I'm unbelievable as a high school student, but when the other people at the audition talk about living with their parents or having their mom drive them there that morning, I feel pretty seasoned. I have no doubt that I'm doing fine at the auditions, I just need to find where I fit. Soon enough we'll figure out where the industry sees me and I'll start booking things, I'm sure of it.

We were called to the theater at 6:30 to do mic check and run a few numbers. Everything seemed to be going along pretty smoothly, and it's always reassuring when you remember your words after nearly a week of no shows. We were all having fun backstage getting ready, and at our half hour i started getting dressed, only to realize I couldn't find my shoes. They're fairly simple black heels, but since I had worn bright pink polka-dotted galoshes there, it was very important to find them or some other alternative. There was a dance show at the theater over the week and our choreographer was in it, so she text'd all the girls to see if anyone had grabbed them by accident. In the meantime, there were some short boots at the theater from a past production of Oklahoma that almost fit and that's what I wore for the first act. It did throw me off a bit. I want to feel very strong and womanly and these shoes didn't allow that. I felt like my acting was a bit off and I did forget some of my words, but hey - it could have been much worse. I'm sure it's better than to have had to go on with the pink rain boots. I didn't even realize until people told me when I got off stage what a huge applause I got after "Nobody's Side".

Luckily one of the dancers had grabbed the shoes, thinking one of her fellow dancers left them behind, and brought them back so I had them for the second act. I felt like that went much more smoothly for me, and we had an amazing audience. We had a woman in the very front row - closer than normal because of the added seats - mouthing every.single.word of every song, which is impressive because most of us in the show couldn't do that. And our musical director pointed out that you know you've got something really good when the audience starts applauding before the song even ends. Josie, one of the cast members, said there were critics in the audience and they absolutely loved the show. I also had a few friends in the audience, people with whom I've worked on projects before, and they thoroughly enjoyed it.

We actually oversold for the night, and even after bringing in more chairs we had to turn a lot of people away that had comp tickets, including another castmate's agent. My manager is coming with a casting director tonight, so I told her to let the people at the box office know who they are just in case we oversell again.

And for those people that got turned away, they'll have six more chances to come see it because we've officially extended the run! Unfortunately not everyone will be able to do the extended shows, so we'll have 2 weeks off to rehearse and put in a few new people, and our extended dates are August 19-21 and 27-29. We're going to record some audio at tonight's show to use as promotional samples on the ticketing websites, and I wouldn't be surprised if we sell out each of the new dates.

After the performance last night a bunch of us went to The Other Side, a piano bar in Silverlake where our pianist plays weekly. People bring their music books or choose songs that he knows how to play and sing along, a kind of live karaoke. I think almost all of us from the show sang at least one song, if not backing up someone else. Sad that we're all really starting to bond when it's the last weekend for some people, but better late than never.

I have a great feeling about tonight, I have at least six people coming to see me and I'm very excited. We've decided to have a cast/crew potluck afterward which I think will be the perfect way to top off a fun/busy/productive week, and send off those that won't be able to continue the extension with us. Our pseudo-closing night is going to be fantastic.

The Home Stretch

Funny that last time I wrote I said that it was getting easier and more fun to blog, but then I don't write again for over a week. Though in my defense, that week-and-then-some passed very quickly since I've been busy busy busy working to open a show in a time span of just over 2 weeks.

So, there's less than a week until Chess opens and I am SOOO excited! The breathing is going much better in case you were wondering. Actually, the first rehearsal we had as a full cast I think I pulled lung muscle. Is that possible? I'm guessing I was so focused on expanding and supporting that I didn't realize I probably pushed my body too hard too fast. Luckily the pain was gone by the next day and I've been more careful about the way I'm warming up and singing.

We started blocking a few days ago and it became apparent how very much music there is in this show by the amount of material we hadn't even had time to look at yet. In the time since I'm pretty sure we covered everything musically, though that doesn't necessarily mean all that's left is the blocking. Some of the most difficult numbers were saved for last, and they're going to take a lot of work to be ready to put in front of an audience. We were informed that we will in fact be able to use our music binders for the performances, but I think a good number of us want to have it all memorized. I'm among those that want to do it without the binder, and I think it's definitely possible with the rate I've been going. If I just focus on those tricky songs for a day or two I'm sure it'll work out.

I got really excited trying to put together my costume today. It's basically black and white stuff, but I have so much of that that I got to tear my closet apart and play dress up. Also, it gives me an excuse to go shopping. They said if anyone couldn't put together their outfit from their own wardrobe not to worry, but... well I am a girl after all. If I still can't find something after shopping, then I'll let them care of it :)

I had a dream last night I found a gray hair on my head, and when I got to work my co-worker pointed one out in the exact same spot as in the dream. Creepy. I'm really not surprised though. Even aside from the whirlwind show, I've got a lot on my plate right now. Luckily the stress isn't overwhelming, I feel like I'm holding things together nicely. I'm actually very glad I've got the show to keep me busy and my brain occupied.

I've got another audition coming up this Monday, for General Hospital. I'll be auditioning to be an Irish girl. Yes, me an Irish girl. Which I recently found out, I am not. Not that I look like it, but when asked what my ethnicity is, I always threw that in the mix. It's an eclectic enough mix anyway, I'm actually surprised that Irish is not in it. Even so, there's still enough left to leave people perplexed.

Oh, I nearly forgot!! I went to see Inn The Heights again last night and it was just as amazing as before. I was in the 4th row this time, which I initially thought would be too close when I first sat down, but it was perfect. I could understand everything that was being said and sung and it was more engaging from that close.

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If you're interested in seeing my show (Chess), tickets can be purchased through www.plays411.com/chessinconcert or at 323.960.7735

Auditions...

First things first - I had an audition for Chess In concert last night. I showed up, sang something from Jekyll & Hyde, and I think that may be the best I've ever sounded in a musical audition. Now I know that if I don't get a callback, it's simply because I'm not what they're looking for. It's great to fees so confident about that.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

My hair has been causing problems for me. It started yesterday when I woke up at 8 to go to a 10:45 audition in Culver City, for a small role in a Justin Timberlake/Mila Kunis movie. I showered and got me hair set to do a beautiful blowout, and decided to use a brush I don't normally use for that. Huge mistake. As I started unrolling my first strand of hair from the brush, it was absolutely stuck just one inch from my scalp. Normally you roll it back up a little or pull a few small strands from the brush to fix that, but it wouldn't budge. I spent at least 20 minutes trying to free the brush from my hair, and I hadn't even decided what to wear yet.

Once I finally found a way to put myself together I set off for Sony studios. Of course, the 10 was awful and I got to the parking structure exactly at my appointment time. Only to find out security didn't have my name in the system, and in calling my manager I found out the audition was for this morning, not yesterday morning.

So I went through it all again today. Woke up about 10 minutes earlier and made sure to use the right brush this time. Everything was going smoothly until I was halfway done with my hair and, pop, my blow dryer exploded. Ok, I guess that's exaggerating a little. But there were some serious sparks that came from it -- and not the part where the air comes out, the part where the cord meets the handle. A bit frightening, I'll admit. There was no way I was letting the other half of my hair air dry with all that mousse in it, so I threw it up in bun and hustled down to Walgreens to buy a new one.

Luckily I had picked my outfit early on accident (remember, I did it the day before!) but got on the road only 10 minutes earlier than I did on the first try. Thank goodness for those extra minutes I gave myself in waking up early. The 10 was fine and I parked with 10 minutes to spare. Seems like "10 minutes" is the theme of this segment... So I check in with security and get a map to find my way aaaaalllllll the way across the lot, past at least 27 sound stages, past the streets and buildings they have on location to tweak to look like real places, and up three flights of stairs. In the summer. In California.

The audition itself felt like it took less than a minute, and it very well may have. There were some girls that were literally in the room for 20 seconds and then they were done. I was called into the room and read my four lines, she gave me a slight adjustment and asked me to do it again. I did and it was fine, and that was that. I feel like it's really going to be based on looks, and though I'm confident in how I look, there were some AMAZING looking girls in that room. I'm find with believing that I didn't get the part, and I'm sure Evan's even happier because if I got it I'd have to make out with Justin Timberlake.

So until next time, I'm just waiting for the next train (that's for you, Lauren!)

Knock On Wood

At the risk of something going awry again, I have to say it.... I have an agency.

As you may remember, a few weeks ago I thought I got the confirmation call on this agency, only to be unsure about it again. Neither I nor my manager was sure what was going on. But she called me on Friday with the good news.... that the two women I initially interviewed with were enthusiastic and anxious and wanted to move ahead, confident that the third agent I met with would come around. Not that he didn't particularly like me, but he was just on the fence and hadn't had time to really sit down with my reel and resume and think about the meeting. So I didn't wow him, no biggie. I charmed the other two enough to do business with the whole agency.

I wanted to write Friday after I got home from the show, but I wasn't sure there was enough to make me confident that this decision would stick. Well, not moments ago I got a call from my manager, saying she got a 'welcome' call from one of the agents. She instructed me to get in touch with the online breakdown service and have them add the agency to my profile. I also gave the agent a call so I can confidently say it is officially official. Phew!! Both the manager and agent told me that agent no. 3 just doesn't work with that many young people so that's why he was on the fence, but that doesn't mean that he won't submit me. They previously had a young client that he himself put on a series, so it's all good news.

I also have an audition for a backdoor pilot on Wednesday. No that's not something dirty - it's a "pilot episode filmed as a standalone movie so it can be broadcast if not picked up as a series", so says Variety. The character is a serious 16 year old girl, I think I can pull that off. Plus, as of today my demo reel is finally up online so hopefully that will bring in more auditions as well. I figure that at this point it's just a numbers game. I'm confident that I can book things and impress people, it's just about finding the role that fits. And now with a manager and a few agents working for me, my chances of finding that role (maybe even many of them) have skyrocketed. I've told people, "it's only taken me 6 years to get this far!" But in actuality, I'm lucky to have gotten so much within a year and a half. After school, I didn't really pursue anything until the beginning of last year. So I really have made huge strides in a short time.

We're down to one more weekend of Godspell, only 5 more shows! What a fun time I've had with this production. Each show we do is more fun than the last. I'm so so happy to have all of these people as my friends. They're all talented and driven and just wonderful people. I could brag about them all day long.

Aaaaaaaaaaand, I'm going to see In The Heights tomorrow. I'm bringing Evan. I think he'll like it.

Another Stepping Stone... Hopefully

Hello! I've been meaning to write another entry for a few days now, but the free time I've had has been spent watching the food network. It's grill week, how could I not??

We closed another successful set of shows this weekend. Doing six shows a weekend, it's easy to see how it's transforming. The more we do it, the more little nuances we find that really work, so they stick. For the most part it's getting more fluid, and we don't have to worry about those damned transitions anymore because we all know what's coming next. I don't think I mentioned this before, but one of the guys will be leaving after this coming weekend. That part was double cast from the beginning because both of the men had conflicts, so one of them is getting the first three weeks of the show, and the other is getting the last three weeks.

It makes the run feel very short knowing that this weekend is the end of the first half, and we'll be able to physically see it happen. Both guys are really fantastic though. The second has been coming to see the shows a couple times a weekend and is a really talented performer, so no one has any doubt that he'll step in like it's nothing. A few of us were talking about it the other day, agreeing that each of them will bring something very different but also very good to the show. I think it might be a nice refresher for all of us too, it will keep the show from becoming muscle memory. That can happen when you do something over and over and over, and if you're not careful you forget why you're doing what you're doing on stage, and just do it. A switch in the cast should prove to be a reminder of just that.

The auditions went well last week. I'll just say it - the audition was for Mean Girls II. It was actually on the Paramount lot instead of a separate casting office, so that was only slightly intimidating but pretty exciting also. The room I was directed to was actually the one where they were filming and not the waiting room and it rattled me a little to have the casting director be (understandably) perturbed when I walked in in the middle of someone's audition. The sides were interesting to work with too... there were 16 pages, and I said only a line or two from each page. It was a little distracting to keep flipping the page after every line. The important part, though, is that I got in that door (figuratively). I also got in the door for an audition for Scream 4. Yeah, they're making a "4". That one I felt went really well. The office was cute, the casting director was laid back and nice, and I was in and out quickly. I don't believe I got either of these, but the fact that I'm getting my face in front of these people is a great thing.

I had a meeting with some agents yesterday. My manager came with me, which I think was great. She's so sweet and she works with these women often so they have a great, friendly rapport. We were there for about 45 minutes, my longest meeting yet. We talked a little about me and my background, but we also talked about the Celtics, friends in the industry, one of the women's nieces.... I found something I've heard over and over to be true: the best thing to do is not talk about yourself. If you look up what to do during a meeting with an agent/manager, every article will tell you this. Treat it like a first date. One of the worst things you can do on a first date is talk on and on about yourself. Yes part of the meeting is about them deciding if your skills will allow them to get you work, but it's also about feeling comfortable with each other and getting a feel for who you'll potentially be working with. I can see how this could work with first meetings in general, but I think it's especially important in the entertainment industry where you are, essentially, selling yourself. Wait, that sounds bad... but in a way it's true.

So that meeting was at 3, and around 6 o'clock I got a call from my manager letting me know that she had just gotten off the phone with the ladies I met with and they loved me. One even wanted to pitch me for something right away, which obviously my manager was ok with. There's one other agent in their company that I didn't get to meet with, but he's taking a look at me reel and if he's cool with it, then I'm in. So hopefully I can update in a few hours letting you all know I have a theatrical agent. Cross your fingers!

When my manager said she was going to keep me busy, she wasn't lying. I auditioned for the British television series yesterday* and now I have auditions for features films tomorrow morning and Thursday morning. I'm looking to get a little coaching from a casting director I worked with a while ago for the Thursday audition. I'm working for the rest of the day and then have plans this evening, but tomorrow's should be pretty easy anyway.

*The audition - I got there at 4:40 for my appointment at 5, and there were at least 7 other people there. For 3 short scenes I figured about 3-5 minutes for each person. Well, I didn't get seen until after 6:00. It's not that unheard of if they've been running behind all day, but some girls were in there for about 15 minutes. Toward the end they had us to only two of the three scenes, and since I was the last one in there I felt like they really wanted to get it over with so it was short and sweet. Though the girls there didn't look any older than me, only one or two looked like they could really pass for 14 years old. But that's just what I saw, there was a page of people before me that I never saw.*

So while I was waiting, my manager called and told me about the audition for Thursday. It's something she mentioned earlier so it was exciting to hear that they want to see me. I got the news about tomorrow's audition while at work today, and that one was a surprise. It's all very exciting, these are both projects I can see myself fitting into well. Ever since the Rock of Ages incident I'm a little weary of telling a lot of people about the projects I'm going out for, but I assure you I'll let you know the details once I book something! A casting director suggested I submit for the new Transformers movie, which would be awesome but I think I should leave that up to my manager. I could ask her about it, but as for actually submitting that would be better left in her arena.

Opening Weekend

We have survived! More than survived I'd say. Compared to tech week, our opening weekend was brilliant.

There were a few technical slip-ups throughout the weekend, but over all the audience responded well. Except for yesterday's matinee - but a party of 57 had cancelled, so the brunch crowd gave us what they could. We have video elements involved, and there was one show (I can't tell you which, they're all mixing together in my mind now) that it completely turned off right in the middle, so we had to get up and act it out ourselves. There's a lot of "playing within the play" anyway so I don't think anyone could tell. We're pros, and unless someone gets seriously hurt I think we can get over anything that could possibly throw us. Today we had two fantastic shows, just pure fun the whole time. I even got a little misty during the finales.

One perk of working with this theater is that we have free access to a beautiful fitness club, The Claremont Club. It has pools, a cardio area, weight area, tennis, basketball, steam rooms, salon, cafe... the list goes on. Me and some of my fellow cast mates took advantage of this today between shows, and we went in the spa to relax. Lemme tell you, it really worked. My muscles still feel nice and loose! I'm planning on getting a massage or two there at some point, and I think the whole cast is going to have a picknick there next Saturday.

I got home about 40 minutes ago, and I had to run straight upstairs because the finale of Lost is on and there's at least 30 people at my house. I'll be camping out here for at least another 15 minutes... I've come to terms that I'll hear some things about the episode when I do come downstairs, but I'll be ok. I just really didn't want to see only the end and then have to get caught up on the whole thing by a bunch of Lost nerds. I'll just have some wild boar and hear what I hear. What, wild boar you ask? Yes, in the spirit of Lost my boyfriend got some wild boar meat and cooked it up. I can't wait to try it.

I am glad that I have a few minutes to blog, I've been meaning to do it all weekend. The audition for the British show is tomorrow so I can go over those lines for a while and figure out what I can wear to suggest I'm a freshman in high school. Hah. Hey, those kids on 90210 are like, 26 right? Anything is possible in the magic world of the entertainment industry.

Plusses And Minuses, But Mainly Plusses

Today was the day I called the agent I met with. I had to leave the house to call her, so I decided to make use of being out and go to the gym. I've gotten back in the habit of keeping planner with me, and it is very helpful. I've got all of my rehearsals/performances written down in it, work hours, meetings, and details of any auditions. Anyway, I left her a message and got a call back while at the gym. Unfortunately they're not going to be able to represent me because of the people they already have in their client base, but it's no big deal. It only makes sense to be represented by a person or company that thinks they can get you work without putting you in competition with their existing clients.

I used the opportunity of being in Hollywood to make some copies of my passport to send in to my manager (I like the sound of that!) with my paperwork. It is now official, I've signed a 2 year contract, and unless absolutely nothing happens within 30 days, I've now arrived at the next step of the journey. She called me right before I got to work, letting me know the people from the project in England want me to come in for an audition on Monday. The role is supposed to be a freshman in high school so that's stretching it a little, but it's worth a try even if I have to tape down my chest and go in wearing pastels with no make up. The script looks like something I'd be comfortable with, so I'm pretty excited.

As for Godspell, we ran if from beginning to end for the first time yesterday, with few and minor interruptions. The set is almost complete, as well as the costumes, and the transitions are getting smoother and smoother. As a whole it's taken the cast a little longer to bond that I'm normally used to, but I can really feel it happening now and that will only add to what great stuff we're already doing on stage. Opening night tomorrow!!!!

Forward.

I was up just after 7:30 this morning. I showered, got dressed and ready, and had breakfast before I headed out to the callback. Only thing is... I didn't get that email.

Yes that's right. I checked my email at least hourly yesterday, but nada. Maybe there was a reason I didn't tell everyone about the callback. I kept wondering if I accidentally attached an old resume, or if they misspelled my email address, or if perhaps the casting director changed her mind about me. I had a little pity party last night, but decided to sleep on it and see how I felt in the morning. When I woke up today I still wasn't sure if it would be wise or fruitful, but I made up my mind to go out to Hollywood where they held the initial audition and wait for people to start showing up.

When I got there at 9:30, the only cars that were there belonged to the asian tourists getting out of them. I waited for a few minutes before deciding to go home to grab my laptop, a book, and some sudoku. I got back and sent a message to a guy I met at the audition, a friend of a friend, and asked if a girl he was hanging out with, who also got a callback, had heard anything yet. Desperate, yes. Luckily he quickly sent a message back, saying he had only met the girl that day, but he did have an email address for one of the casting coordinators. I sent a quick email to them and waited. Until almost 2:30. And nothing.

Of course it's very frustrating, wondering what happened. Something obviously went wrong somewhere. But on top of that, I could have worked this morning. With rehearsals and meetings and auditions going on, that's happening less and less. And speaking of, my rehearsal for Godspell Started at 2. Luckily my director is very understanding and trusts that we have a strong show on the way, so he said just get there when I could. I'm glad I gave it a shot, because I know I'd probably be mad at myself if I didn't.

I got to rehearsal at about 3:30 and found out some good news: they want me to be dance captain! That's really exciting, it's something that's crossed my mind before. As I've said before, I don't consider myself a strong dancer, but I do learn things pretty quickly. So I'm going to give it my best shot. Plus, it'll look good on my resume!

I'm getting help to put together a reel this weekend. I'm so lucky to be surrounded by talented and helpful people. Yesterday I had a little chat with Ron, the director from RENT, about the meetings that are coming up for me. He was very helpful, telling me some things I had been hearing, and other things that were long forgotten to me. Over the past months he's become someone I look up to, and it was great to get some input from him. After I got off the phone with him I realized that I'm scared. This is when my career is really starting and I can see it happening. Yes it's scary, but also very exciting. Once I push through the new hard stuff I believe more and more good things will happen for me.

Where Is That Email?

Alright, finally a real post again. So where to begin?

I have a meeting set for 11:30 on Monday morning with the agent. Then there's also this manager thing. Now, this one also came about because of the student film I did last year - only this time it wasn't me who cast the line out, they actually found me! I got an email from the director, and it was a forwarded message from a woman (manager) saying the head of her company saw the film and recommended she get in touch with me. Sweeeet. So we've planned on meeting sometime on Tuesday. I called up my director from RENT to ask if he had any advice, and he told me that one of the most important things is to know exactly what I want. My only problem right now is that I think I want everything. Not in terms of fame and fortune, though that would be cool, but I want to do everything possible. I'd love to work in film, television, commercials, voiceovers, stage, I want to sing/dance/act/perform everywhere and everything. I think the first step is to focus on what I want to get out of working with an agent, and overall out of my career. I've got two and a half days to figure that out.

In other news... I'd been looking forward to the Rock of Ages national tour audition since it was first posted. I love all (well, most) kinds of musical theatre, but now that I know I can sing rock well, it's what I gravitate to. I arrived at the audition location around 9:30 in the morning and was almost #90 in line. My friend Tim, who was in the second RENT with me, got there just before I did so it was nice to be able to hang out with him while we waited. They started seeing people a little after 10, but so many of us showed up to audition that there just wasn't going to be enough time to see everyone. Tim and I were going to be the next people brought in to sing, when the casting director came out and told everyone she had to start typing. That's when they take a look at you (or your headshot) and decide whether you have the right look or not. Luckily my headshot stood out to her, so an hour later I walked in the room to sing. As soon as I opened my mouth I heard echo everywhere. It startled me a little, but I don't think it threw me off. I got through about 5 seconds of "Lights" by Journey when she stopped me. She asked how my dance is, and I said it's ok. She then told me she wanted to call me back for Saturday, and to look for an email with the info.

Great! Fantastic! I'm so excited! Though I haven't gotten the email yet. If I don't get it, I plan on just showing up at 10 and hoping they're doing the callbacks at the same place the audition was. I'm probably stressing out more than I should... still, my brain just won't stop. I think I would be so great for this show, and if I don't get it because of someone misspelling or overlooking my email address, I'll be very upset.

I've also got Godspell opening on the 21st, which means this coming week will be tech week. It's a little intimidating. The show, the way it's structured, is so strange to me. It's a big challenge and I like that, but it's still tough not to have a real story line through the whole play. What's nice is I'll probably be wearing my own clothes. It's been a while since I've worked with a costumer that's really impressed me, so if I look like a fool now it's my own fault! Hah. It's very exciting, we're going to put up a great show.

Hm. Breathe.

Lets Get This Started

I woke up yesterday feeling much better. I think I just needed to stop thinking about all of it for a while and what better way to do that than sleeping for a few hours. I even got through the whole day without feeling awful! See, it's getting better already. Part of my feeling better was probably because I wrote an email to Raul explaining how sorry I was to disappoint him and the director he was working with, and that I'd leaned to be more conscious of my prior obligations before I auditioned for something in the future. Though I haven't heard anything back, it felt good to take responsibility and touch base one more time.

My friends and family are all being very supportive about my decision. Evan keeps telling me that any choice I make is the right choice, and I suppose he's right. There's really no telling where each job will take me career wise, so all I can do is believe in the choices I make and do my best to make them the better choice. I've decided that this summer I'm going to be working on my career like never before. Along with being healthy and going to the gym, I'm going to set a deadline to get new headshots (and save up to get them printed out too, not just shot!), wrangle myself an agent and/or manager, expand my songbook, look into acting classes.... everything I can think of I'll do.

I was referred to an agent by a guy I did a student film with (which, by the way, recently won "Best Comedy" at the college level equivalent of the Emmys) so I'll be sending in my stuff this week. I found out in this week's issue of Backstage that it's very common for acting schools and conservatories to not go into the business of acting at all. I'm very lucky that AMDA actually did. A large portion of out last semester was focused on informing us about the business side of acting, and though I honestly haven't employed most of this information since graduating, I still have all my papers and notes and that helps me to feel confident. I imagine a lot of this summer will be spent re-reading all of that information that I got while in school.

My point in saying all that stuff about school is, I wrote my first cover letter yesterday. In the past I've gone to Samuel French and picked up the latest print out of agents, large envelopes, and decided who'd I thought I'd be a good fit with, but never ever sent anything out. Also, the fist headshots I ever had taken - at least 4 years ago - are the only ones I've ever had printed out in bulk. So this is the summer I update everything, including my work ethic. It's already had a slow start as of the beginning of last year, but this will be the push.

Whats Done Is Done

Evan told me that the sarcasm didn't come across in the very last part of last part of yesterday's entry, so for anyone that was wondering, yes that was a joke.

Well. I've spent at least half the day crying or wanting to cry so far. I woke up with a headache and a weird pit of the stomach feeling. I figured I'd call Raul, politely turn down the offer, and start feeling better. When I called I let him know that I was very sad to turn down such a wonderful opportunity, but unfortunately I wouldn't be able to take the job. He told me that yes, it was very unfortunate because as soon as I walked into the room the director knew I was exactly what he was looking for. He sounded so disappointed, and that's what broke my heart.

I've decided maybe it wasn't the best choice, but it was the right choice. I'm so afraid that I've burnt a bridge with this lovely casting director. He casts a lot of things and always happily brings me in for projects, and I don't want him thinking I'm not accountable. I also don't want him thinking I'm not serious about my career as an actor. Hopefully he respects the fact that I'm taking into consideration many obligations that I've already committed myself to.

The call would probably have been easier to make if we didn't have a dance rehearsal last night. Now, to start off with - I do not doubt in any way David's vision for this show not the abilities of him or my castmates to put on a wonderful production. We're all going to have fun and give it our all. It's just.... I can dance, but I'm not a "dancer" in the way the industry qualifies dancers. So I get this crazy news yesterday and let it soak in for a while, and when I'm pretty darn sure I've made up my mind, I have to learn some funky stomp dance, and make my hands tap dance with shoes on them. Calling Raul while sore and exhausted was just that much harder this morning.

It's hard to keep my mind from thinking the worst, like I'm being a coward or that I've put a serious roadblock up for myself, but somewhere inside I do know that I'm not and I haven't. I know I'll feel better within a week, my magic 8 ball even told me so, but I really feel like crap right now. But then, I'd feel awful either way. I'm quite literally making myself ill. Evan got me a delicious bagel this morning to make me feel better, and now I can't even imagine eating anything for the rest of the day. And this headache..... ugh.

My hope is that even though I'm missing out on a fantastic opportunity and adventure, I will have more openings for others that I can take advantage of. Now I definitely know that I should know all of my schedules and have my priorities in order before I audition for something.