Tonight is the preview night for Chess. We're going to have an audience, and it's actually going to be the very first time we've run the entire show from beginning to end. When I told my coworker this, she asked if I was nervous. I told her that I had butterflies, but now an hour and a half later I realize that I am nervous. It's strange, since I don't remember the last time I was actually nervous before a show. I'm used to having butterflies, because putting up a show is always exciting for me. I've gotten very good at trusting that I know the show and that if anything goes wrong it will be fixed. So this is strange, knowing I will be just fine but still feeling a little scared.
I'm pretty sure it's the situation rather than self confidence. I've never put up a show in this amount of time, not to mention I'd only heard a few songs before being cast. We've had the orchestra for three days, they just got their music Monday, and we just finished the blocking yesterday. Also, I was talking with the music director yesterday and at one point he gave me one of those looks and said something to the effect of: Don't freak out, but this is a huge opportunity for you. Make the most of it.
Even with all of this in my mind, I'm absolutely positive that we've put together an incredible show. I think anyone I know that has seen me perform before will be impressed at how different this is than anything else I've done. Plus, I'm hitting higher notes than I ever thought possible for my voice :)
I'm so pleased that I've been trusted to take on such an important role, and proud of myself for taking the strides to make it happen. Writing all this out is really helping me feel better. I know as soon as I hit the stage the adrenaline will kick in and all will be fine. I wish there was a chance for more performances. This show is so rarely done, and I know that there will be a lot of people coming to see it.
And on that note, there are a few 1/2 price tickets available on www.goldstar.com for this weekend! Search for Chess In Concert or The Met theatre.
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